EPIC Chaos 8 May 18th 2020 May 18, 2020 20:51:18 GMT -5
Posted by EPIC Producers on May 18, 2020 20:51:18 GMT -5
A Celebration Interrupted
The opening instrumental to "The Fox (What Does the Fox Say?) by Ylvis starts playing over the loudspeakers as the crowd starts bouncing along to the music knowing they are going to see the new EPIC World Champion for the first time since he won the title last week.
Dog goes "woof"
Cat goes "meow"
Bird goes "tweet"
And mouse goes "squeek"
Cow goes "moo"
Frog goes "croak"
And the elephant goes "toot"
Ducks say "quack"
And fish go "blub"
And the seal goes "ow ow ow"
But there's one sound
That no one knows
What does the fox say?
El Diablo Blanco jumps out from behind the curtain dancing along to the music as the fans chant along with the chorus of the song. He is donning his blue sharktooth suit and carrying the EPIC World Title with him, using it as a proverbial guitar as he strums along to the music. Continuing dancing all the way to the ring, fans are reaching over the barricade patting him on the back. Diablo finally rolls in under the bottom rope and stands in the middle of the ring hoisting the title up for all to see. With a smile stretching from ear to ear, El Diablo tosses the belt over his shoulder as he is handed a microphone.
El Diablo Blanco: This one is for the entire DIABLO NATION!!!
The crowd erupts with cheers.
El Diablo Blanco: You know, brothers and sisters, just a few months ago I would never believe that I would be standing here today the EPIC World Champion. Being a World Champion is what every person in this sport strives to be. If they tell you differently, they're just lying to themselves. Many spend years following that dream and a good portion of those never see the end of their rainbow.
El Diablo pauses for a moment to just look at the title.
El Diablo Blanco: I'm sorry. I feel like at any moment I'm going to wake up and find out that this was all just a dream. The reality of the situation though is, as great of a feeling holding this belt, the symbolization behind it is so much greater. You see, I'm just your average guy brothering it out for all of you. I'm not 7'3" 9000 pounds. I'm not one jacked to the gills. Some may say I've got myself a dad bod. But that's the thing. That's the message going out there to all you Little Diablitos watching at home. That's the message to my 20-somethings just trying to figure themselves out. That's to my almost middle aged brothers out there ready to have a mid life crisis. If you put your mind to it. If you truly devote yourself to something. This EPIC World Title proves that anything is achievable as long as you put your full heart into it. Can you dig it, Brothers?
There are a sprinkle of fans out in the arena now standing up and applauding their hero, El D. Those cheers, however, soon change to a chorus of boos as-
“YOU’LL NEVER GET FREE.
LAMBS TO THE SLAUGHTER.
WHATCHU GON’ DO?
WHEN THERE’S BLOOD IN THE WATER?”
Graham Baker makes his way down the entrance ramp, motioning for his music to be cut as he holds a microphone up to his lips.
Baker: Hold the fucking phone. You’re telling me we’re giving just anyone a world championship? We’re gonna hand one of the most prestigious belts in this sport off to a fuckin’ loser like El Disappointment over there
The crowd boos, and Baker shakes his head.
Baker: Sorry, El D. No disrespect meant to you until I found out you were holding my belt. I couldn’t hang too hard last week, but seeing you beat Hungry Jack? Seeing you take what was rightfully mine? It made my blood boil a bit. Made me frustrated. You see, I’ve worked for everything I’ve been given. I beat Ryan Shane bloody, and I claimed dibs on Jack’s belt. It should have gone to me, not some fucking loser who couldn’t even make it through real training.
Baker takes another few steps toward the ring, and enters, stepping closer to El Diablo.
Baker: You think you deserve that? You think that just because you beat a loser like Swanson, you deserve a world championship? That belt never should have been on Swanson-hell, it’s a chain of never-shoulds with it, but it never should have touched his waist. Never should have touched yours, either. The only men in this company worthy of carrying that championship are the five men who make up RI5EN. The only men who can carry this company on their back don’t waste their time with taco bell and brand endorsements, they go for victories and championships. Your connection to this business is frayed like a thin string, ready to snap at any moment when someone-or something-bigger comes along.
Baker goes nearly nose to nose with El D.
Baker: So here’s the deal, El Diablo. In front of all your ‘Diablitos’ here, I want you to vacate that championship. I want you to lay it down on the mat and go back to the violence division, where you and Drake Connors and Daniel Dream can play grab-ass until Hix decides he’s tired of playing with his toys and comes for it. I want you to tell the crowd the truth of the matter, that you can’t beat Graham Baker, because you’re not half the wrestler he is. Hell, you’re not even a quarter or tenth of the wrestler he is. You’re not fit to tie his boots, you’re not fit for him to lock up with. You’re only fit to have your face spat upon for defiling this sport by being as you are.
Baker takes a step back.
Baker: Go ahead. Say your goodbyes, and put your belt down. I’ll take care of it, I promise.
Baker wears a cocky smile, and El Diablo looks primed to say something, before he notices-with a boo from the crowd-that the other four members of RI5EN have surrounded the ring. Diablo looks at the championship, and considers dropping it...before he SWINGS at Baker and hits him with a wild haymaker! He looks primed to take on the rest of RI5EN, hitting both members of Wyldeside with wild punches, but Hix and Maverick are able to quickly overwhelm him! Baker pulls himself back up as Diablo tries to throw the men off, but he finds himself outnumbered! Baker looks to Hix, and demands something, and Hix removes it from his side-a kneepad covered in thumbtacks! Baker places it over his own knee, taps it-AND RAMS DIABLO WITH A THUMBTACK-ASSISTED 1789! The tacks rend through Diablo’s mask and into his flesh, and blood spills from his face dripping from the openings in his mask as Baker gives a thumbs down to the rest of RI5EN.
Maverick directs traffic as Hix hits Faceless on Diablo, while Wyldeside drag a table into the ring! They set it up, and, at Baker’s direction, pour more tacks out over it. Wyldeside pull Diablo up, and Maverick assists-FOR A THREE MAN POWERBOMB THROUGH THE TABLE! Diablo’s laid out as Baker approaches, grabbing El Diablo’s championship from off the mat and just looks at it before he holds it high to a massive boo from the crowd! El Diablo Blanco continues to lie motionless as RI5EN stand tall.
Lessons From An Angel
“Superficial” by Hiedi Montang starts to play on the sound system as the fans boo loudly, already knowing who is set to make their way out. The lights then dim and flash all over the arena as a red carpet is rolled out and from the back flanked by her private security is the “Trillion-Dollar Princess” Angel Kash. Looking glamorous as ever in her black mink fur entrance robe and black sunglasses, she saunters her way down to the ring avoiding the touch of the fans, but still taking the time to taunt them showing herself off. Despite having to deal with a mystery opponent, she has a huge smirk on her face. She orders her security to open the ropes for her, which they do without fail, and then she climbs up the steel steps taking her time to enter under the bottom rope. She poses arrogantly in the center of the ring before ordering the stagehand to hand her security a microphone. Angel then motions for her music to be cut, taking the microphone from her security as she places a hand on her hip and raises the microphone towards her perfectly glossed lips, the fans still booing her loudly.
Angel Kash: Will you peasants shut up?!
This causes the fans to just boo louder, to which Angel rolls her eyes.
Angel Kash: Now last week you morons witnessed a crushing defeat for poor Onyx. I mean it didn’t have to be that way? No, he could have been smart and taken the ten thousand dollars I was offering him and left. But no, he had to play hero, he had to fight for his honor and what happened? Oh right, I beat him fairly and easily.
The fans immediately go back to booing loudly, some even voicing how she cheated, which offends Angel who starts to speak up again.
Angel Kash: Oh please, is it my fault he got himself knocked out? Anyway, I was going to be nice and give him a free makeover, but that was interrupted by everyone’s favorite pest Risa. See Risa you’re not the smartest girl around. I gave you a free sample of what happens when you stand up to me two weeks ago, and instead of learning your place, you decide to interrupt me. Well, little girl, you made the biggest mistake and tonight you’re not even here. Guess you must be scared because I have ways of making sure people learn their lesson.
Angel chuckles to herself, an evil smirk appearing on her face before she continues.
Angel Kash: Because you know that tweet EPIC made about their signing that will shake the company? It was obviously about me. I am the newest hottest and biggest signing in EPIC Wrestling history. Tonigh will be another lesson in that, when I take some ugly disgusting peasant from the street corner, humiliate them in front of the whole world, and then leave this disgusting cesspool of a city. Oh and sip on some mimosas after in true upper-class fashion. So lets get this over with because my limo is awaiting me.
Angel drops the microphone smirking as she taunts the crowd some more. She then climbs onto the turnbuckle, sitting with one leg crossed over the other waiting on her opponent to arrive.
Angel Kash vs. Mystery Opponent
Bridget Lewis-Killings: Angel’s revealed mystery opponent was none other than the masked wrestler Super Tiger. The two wasted no time getting things started as you’ll see now. Let’s turn things over to the match highlights.
The feed switches over to ringside where we see an aggressive lockup between the two women, Tiger backing Angel into the corner much to Kash’s shock, who didn’t expect much challenge wise. Tiger with the clean break, but Angel takes her down with a cheap clothesline. Delivering a Running Bulldog to Tiger just as she gets to her feet, followed by a few stomps, Kash then taunts the fans who boo her. However she isn’t paying attention to Tiger who has gotten back to her feet and greets her with a rough turnaround followed by a series of arm drags, dropkicks, wrapping up her barrage with a Headscissors Takedown for a two count. A desperate and slightly dazed Angel motions for her security to pass her the hidden perfume bottle but Tiger stops the pass, kicking the bottle away, before rocking Kash with a Superkick that sends her down to the mat, much to the delight of the fans. The masked marvel makes her way up to the top rope now, looking down at the prone Angel and giving a satisfied nod. Super Tiger then rips off her mask to reveal RISA underneath, sending the fans into a frenzy of cheers as she looks ready to land her Flight of the Tiger (Rotating Frog Splash) on Angel. Stirring just a bit, Kash looks up and seeing RISA perched up top causes her to hurriedly roll out of the ring. RISA jumps down, yelling for her to get back in the ring but Angel is having none of it, the referee calling for the bell after a count out with RISA giving chase.
Bridget Lewis-Killings: While it was a bit of a sour ending to an otherwise good match, it looks like things between RISA and Angel Kash still need to be settled. A count out calls an end to this match at the 4 minute, 38 second mark.
A tight shot pans back on some random door down some random hallway of the Chaos Complex. The door opens and the fans of EPIC are treated to the newest signee, Jon Johns Johnson, along with his sister and manager, Jenna. 3J as he’s known is all smiles as he runs his fingers through his trimmed goatee.
3J: This is so surreal. My first real contract. Now my first piece of merchandise will be ready next week. Pops would be so proud.
Jenna: Would he? That shirt design makes no sense.
3J: Whatcha mean it makes no sense? I’m repping the collective.
Jenna: The collective? You only covered two-thirds of yourself. That’s hardly the collective.
3J: You’re the one college educated. Do I really need to spell it out to you? The shirt says J Squared. That’s four J’s. Three for me, one for you.
Jenna: J squared is only two Js.
3J: It’s a square. A square has 4 sides. J squared means 4 Js.
Jenna: Jonny, it’s…
3J: Jenna, it doesn’t matter. Let’s just relish the moment. We made it! We actually made it. C’mon, let’s go celebrate….I hear gambling is actually legal in this state…
As they turn the corner, 3J bumps into a man in a cheap black suit.
3J: Sorry, sorry...lemme help you.
James Phillips: No time. I’m a booking agent. You need to get your ring gear on. You’re booked in your first match tonight….
3J rushes off, leaving Jenna behind. She turns around, heading back to the marketing room. As she opens the door she can be heard talking.
Jenna: The shirt and logo stay. But for it to make sense, well drop his middle name. After this week, it’s Jonny Johnson, J Squared.
Ryden Lauffeyson vs. Onyx
Bridget Lewis-Killings: Our next featured match shows the EPIC Chaos debut for Ryden Lauffeyson as he takes on the veteran Onyx. While Ryden was originally sought after during the CCW merger, issues with his work visa prevented him from making his way to the company. Now with the thanks of EPIC’s team, Lauffeyson is looking to take advantage of the opportunity and impress. Will he make his first mark at the expense of Onyx, or will the 25 year veteran finally be able to score his second victory? Let’s find out.
The image on the screen switches over to the match feed as we see Ryden and Onyx lockup in the center of the ring. Lauffeyson is able to secure a go behind thanks to a sneaky foot stomp and then gets Onyx in a headlock. The veteran powers out of it though, delivering a surprise bodyslam before he starts to pander to the fans. This proved to be unwise though as Ryden was quick to recover and unloads on Onyx as soon as the big man turns around. Taking him down with various kicks and lariats, he finishes his work with a running big boot that takes Onyx down. Rather than go for the cover though, Ryden backs himself into the corner, amping himself up as Onyx struggles to get to his feet. Just as the veteran turns himself towards Lauffeyson, he comes charging out the corner, taking Onyx out with Helgi's Thrust (Spear from the Corner) and getting the pinfall victory.
Bridget Lewis-Killings: While Onyx certainly brought his best, it wasn’t enough on this night. An impressive and relatively quick win came for Ryden Lauffeyson who picked up the victory against Onyx at the 2 minute, 24 second mark.
Get What You Want And Go
Cameras switch over to the backstage area, where we see the ‘Super Tiger’ RISA, still in her gear from earlier tonight, looking around, her usual smile replaced by a determined and slightly aggravated expression. She knocks and checks inside a few rooms, before looking over at the door to the private office of EPIC Co-Owner Analicia Morales-Connors. RISA approaches and knocks somewhat gently a couple times, waiting for the distant voice of Analicia to state that she may enter. Opening the door, RISA takes a few steps inside, stopping as her boss speaks out to her, in her usual tone.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Shut the door behind you and have a seat RISA. What’s going on?
RISA: I think you know what's going on Mrs. Connors ma'am. Angel Kash cheated during our first match trying to blind me, and then tonight, she ran off and got counted out!
Risa crosses her arms over her chest with a huff, plopping into a chair. Analicia can’t help but let out a sigh as she tries to maintain her composure.
Analicia Morales-Connors: You do realize I’ve already reached my social limit for today right? While Quinn is more than happy to run his mouth and smile like a tool for the sake of the workers, I actually am one and prefer to just have business dealt with and move on. I know what happened in your matches. What I mean by what’s going on now, is what are you looking to do about it? Also, don’t call me ma’am. I understand you’re being respectful, but you may call me by my first name.
Risa looks at the woman across the desk from her with a sigh.
RISA: Look, I just want a fair match! I tried giving her one, but for some reason, Angel won't stay and fight! I came to you because I was hopin' you'd make her wrestle me or something, Analicia.
Risa kicks her feet back and forth, seeing as they sit about two inches off the floor.
RISA: I didn't come here to play Hide and Go Seek with a woman who has more than enough money to change the name of that game and trademark it. I just wanna wrestle!
Analicia Morales-Connors: Well then you actually did come to the right person then because I’m the type that I feel like too much talk is irritating and things need to get settled in the ring. However, before she ran off for the night, she mentioned how she refuses to waste her time and blah, blah, you get the idea.
Analicia is quick to roll her eyes, her annoyance over the situation quite apparent.
Analicia Morales-Connors: So just like I told her, I’m going to tell you the deal. Next week on Chaos there is going to be a tag team match. Team RISA against Team Angel. Doesn’t matter who’s in it, but what matters are the stakes. Your team wins, you face Angel at Mayhem in a match where she can’t get away from you. Angel’s team wins, she gets her wish and you have to stay away from her.
Risa's jaw drops, and her eyes go wide.
RISA: Are… are you serious? Fine. Deal. My partner? It can be ANYONE? Anyone I want. Right?
Analicia Morales-Connors: Anyone you want, just no actual animals. The last thing we need is another damn PETA raid.
Risa is already on the phone, nodding.
RISA: Thanks Boss Lady! We'll be ready for whoever Angel pays to fight us!
The little Asian grins, bows, then runs out of the room excitedly.
The Kaiju Krushers vs. J² and Mercy Payne
Images of the two teams in the next contest are shown on the screen behind Bridget as we return to the studio.
Bridget Lewis-Killings: Next up we have an interesting tag team contest as The Kaiju Krushers consisting of Ōkami no Ame and Hayato Sagara who have teamed many times but this will be the first time on American soil take on the debuting Jonny Johnson and Mercy Payne. Here’s how this one went down.
The images on the screen changes to the highlights of the match as she turns her attention to them. Early on the more experienced team controlled the action with crisp tags and a good deal of tandem offense including a beautiful Doomsday version of Okami’s leaping palm strike as they isolated J² before he was able to make the hot tag to Mercy Payne who showed her hard hitting MMA influenced style putting on a kicking display that had her team back in the mix. After nearly making Hayato submit to a deep Ankle Lock before the former Violence Champion was able to reach the ropes Mercy tagged back in Jonny who was able to drop Hayato with a Running Bulldog before he could tag in Okami. Johnson then went up top for a Moonsault playing to the crowd a bit too long as Sagara got his knees up. J² writhed on the mat clutching his chest and stomach while Hayato waited for him to stand before blasting him with You Go Sleepy-Time turning his lights out. Mercy tried to make the save but a forearm shot to the jaw from Okami stopped her as Hayato cover J² for the 1...2….3!
Bridget Lewis-Killings: Great tag team action there as The Kaiju Krushers pick up the win over Jonny Johnson and Mercy Graves who despite losing looked like they have bright futures in EPIC. The official time was 19 minutes and 4 seconds in this crowd pleasing tag team contest.
Enough with the Clichés
It’s a taped vignette. The scene is a red brick fireplace with a cherry wood mantle. The architecture is gothic. The mantle has a collection of various carnie masks. In front of the fireplace, in rose pink painted wicker chair with a high back and matching arms is the man known as Damien Maddox. With his black hair pulled up behind him, his beard is long and thick and accentuates his lower face to add an intimidating, maybe even terrifying feel to his look without being too far over the top. His garb is normal, dark blue denim pants, plain black coat, with a black leather coat with buckles. Once the whole scene is absorbed, the camera pulls in on a closer shot of the face of the man known as Damien Maddox
Damien Maddox: Cliches. Define a cliché? A washed up failed football player becomes a successful professional wrestler. A man can talk circles but can’t distinguish wrestling from violence becomes a champion. The silver spooned rich kid is an abhorrent prig. The lunatic hears voices, maybe even talks to himself. The innovator of violence can’t wrestle his way out of a paper bag.
He spins an eighteen-inch black ash rod with a carnie mask of bronze on the end.
Damien Maddox: The goth guy wears corpse paint. The crazy or the intellect speaks incoherently but the people pretend to understand to be enthralled by it. Sexuality is pushed with false bravado to supplant anything of real substance.
Damien taps the rod on the palm of his hand.
Damien Maddox: The clichés don’t stop with the characterizations. They go with the past as well. Daddy didn’t love me. My uncle fiddled with my virgin asshole. Mommy was a whore. Papa cast too large a shadow. It’s all used to gain sympathy, garner a reaction, to make people care one way or the other, because true failure is a lack of interest. It’s all so cliched.
Damien stops tapping the rod.
Damien Maddox: I won’t be a cliché; I don’t need to. I could tell you my tragic backstory, but it’s my story. Am I crazy? Yes. But must I fake voices in my head or run around unstable to sell it? No. Simple truth is, I’m a scary man. You look at me, you listen to me, you fear me. Not because I paint myself up, and definitely not because I put myself in unnecessary and contrived places. I don’t need the slow burn industrial music, or the brooding goth tune. You fear me because you see me for what I am. You fear me because while crazy, you understand me. You fear me because for a man that looks as I do, with a reputation such as I, I’m well-spoken and my words are coherent. You fear me not because some clichés tell you to fear me, you fear me because of that feeling in the gut of your stomach when you’re exposed to me. You would be right to fear me, because I’m brilliantly insane.
Damien chuckles in a barely audible tone and the scene fades to black.
WHO ARE YOU?!
The camera goes backstage to show an irate Ryden yanking on Patroller Black's helmet, much to the annoyance of Black.
Ryden: I'm tired of the games, Drake! You're gonna show me and the rest of the world who you really are under this ridiculous outfit!
Black: Ma'am... Ma'am! Please stop. That's really uncomfortable and it's starting to make my neck hurt.. Ma'am, please, you're gonna throw out your hip!
Ryden: Shut up and take it off! TAKE IT OFF! TAKE! IT! OFF!
The sound of someone singing can be heard in the background.
??: Whoooo are you? Who, who, who, who?
Then Drake, who is singing in perfect pitch, rounds the corner and spots Ryden and Black. Ryden spots Drake around the same time and stops yanking on Black's helmet after one final tug.
Ryden: Wait, what? I thought that... You... Him... No freakin way! This is just some actor or something! I know you're Patroller Black!
Drake stares at Ryden for a moment, then giggles, then outright guffaws.
Drake: Bro, if I was gonna prank you, it wouldn't be with that tool. Actors are too expensive. He really ISN'T me. Been telling you from the start.
Black: Ma'am, if you could release your hold on my cranium, I would be much obliged.
Ryden realizes he's still got his hands on Black's helmet and releases it with annoyance.
Ryden: Dammit, stop callin' me ma'am! I'm a MAN.
Black: In today's world, one can never be certain, citizen! Besides, it's friggin' hard to see out of this thing, and now it's all out of whack from you yanking on it like it was your pud.
Drake bursts out laughing as Ryden lunges toward Black, only to catch another spark gun attack to his eyes as Black hauls ass out of there.
Frank Lowe vs. Nanners
We return to the studio and the smiling face of Bridget Lewis-Killings.
Bridget Lewis-Killings: Our next match up pits Nanners against the man who will face Daniel Dream at Mayhem: Devil’s Due to be named the number #1 contender for the EPIC World Championship. Daniel would make an appearance midway through the match leading to absolute chaos, no pun intended, and an outcome not a single person expected, let’s take a look.
Bridget turns her attention to the screen behind her where Nanners has already made his way to the ring, sparing us from the sounds of Justin Beiber. Frank made his way out without his wife Lacey and as soon as the bell sounded he was all over Nanners hitting him with a big power slam right out of the gate that shook the ring. Lowe controlled the match in every way, and could have put the Mad Banana away on multiple occasions but choose to toy with him while scream “I’m the #1 Contender!” to which the fans inside the Chaos Complex responded with “No You’re Not!” the crowd erupted with cheers when “The EPIC Gamer” made his way out and began jawing with “The Lowe Hanger”. As Frank leaned over the ropes to tell Dream that “real men don’t play video games” the unthinkable happened and Nanners surprised Frank with a school boy roll up and a handful of tights scoring the first win of his career and the biggest upset in EPIC history.
Bridget Lewis-Killings: NANNERS WINS! In an unbelievable turn of events, and largely in part to the distraction of Daniel Dream, Nanners defeats Frank Lowe in 4 minutes 43 seconds but there was no time to celebrate as we’re about to show you.
The feed returns to the closing moments of the match and Daniel backs up the ramp leaving an irate Frank Lowe standing over Nanners as he cowers in the corner. Nanners tries for a low blow to get some separation but Frank grabs his arm and just slings him across the ring. Frank turns him upside down putting him in a Tree of Woe before rolling out of the ring and grabbing a steel chair. He throws it into the ring and then slides back in. He places the chair in front of Nanners face and then steps to the other side of the ring before charging forward into a Baseball slide that drives the chair into Nanners face. Blood begins to seep through the thick Banana skin and Lowe drops to a knee and begins to try to remove the head from the Banana costume when the crowd explodes as Terra Mason comes racing down the ramp. Sliding into the ring, she uses her speed to duck under a clothesline attempt by Frank who turned as he heard the crowd’s reaction. Using the ropes as a springboard she connects with a stiff enziguri. She hits him with a few more clubbing blows, but Frank manages to scramble away, looking as if he’s seen a ghost as his wife Lacey comes running from the back to help him collect himself on the outside. Terra takes a second to look over the injured banana but doesn’t take her eyes off of Frank, her gaze somewhat hollow.
Shortly after suffering a loss to Kaiju Krushers, the announcers make the official announcement that the manager/sister of 3J has now changed his ring name to J². J² hears this on the screen in gorilla, and smiles, liking it. Then the EPIC faithful watch as J² walks the halls with his red and black wrestling pants along with a black t-shirt that says “Look mom, I’m on TV”. He approaches a door marked “Women's Dressing Room”. He covers his eyes and knocks on the door. The door flies open revealing J²s partner, Mercy Payne. Her long blonde locks now hang free from the tight braids she wore in the match, her makeup still smeared but she’s covered her gear top with her “No Mercy for the Weak” black half shirt. Her arms are completely sleeved out in an array of intricate tattoos as well as her rib cage. She levels an annoyed look at her partner and raises a brow.
Mercy Payne: Whaddya want showboat?
J² pushes past her into the dressing room and glances around.
J²: Good, you’re decent. I thought I’d come by and tell you, we looked AWESOME out there. I mean sure, we lost, but it’s our first match together. You learn you live, ya know.
Mercy walks back into the dressing room, nudging his shoulder as she passes him to take a seat where she starts to remove the tape around her wrists.
Mercy Payne: I know I looked phenomenal out there but what the hell bro? I handed you a perfect pin opportunity and you blew it. You gotta get serious out there if this is gonna work. I DON’T lose bro, plain and simple. You think you can handle that?
He shrugs his shoulders and holds his hands up.
J²: It’s all good. We’ll win next week because I talked to the booking committee. We’re doing it again next week. I can already see it...first ever tag team champions. How awesome is this gonna be?
Mercy tosses the tape down and gives him a wary look.
Mercy Payne: We’ll win if you quit playing to the crowd so much. You wanna be tag champs, follow my lead bro. You know I went undefeated in MMA and I came here to dominate, not let my partner piss it away. Don’t make me look bad.
She stands up to her full height, just a couple inches shy of J².
Mercy Payne: We can do this cause we are awesome. I know I am at least. You gonna prove me right next week?
J²: That's easy peezie lemon squeezie...we got this. I can already see it right now..J-Payne..that’s us...tag team legends. See ya next week, partner...don’t screw it up...
J² turns and leaves with a perky smile on his face.
Mercy rolls her sapphire eyes as the door swings closed. She runs her heavily tattooed hand through her hair and sighs heavily.
Mercy Payne: It’s not me that worries me. J-Payne my ass. I’ll have CT work on a real name if he doesn’t fuck it up again.
She begins to head to the shower as the scene fades out.
EPIC Elite Champion Maverick vs. Vanessa Darquesse (Non-Title)
Bridget Lewis-Killings: Up next we have EPIC Elite Champion Maverick in action against the debuting Vanessa Darquesse. Now while this match is non-title, Darquesse has a huge opportunity to put herself in line for an immediate title match should she pick up a win over the champion. Will she be able to seize the moment, or will the young but crafty Maverick continue his roll and prove why he’s the Elite of EPIC?
Following Bridget’s question, the show feed shifts back to ringside as the bell sounds to start the match. Vanessa Darquesse looks to go for a lockup but the quicker champion side steps her, insulting the new star with a slap to the back of the head. Darquesse charges again, this time looking to strike but Mav is able to duck under, catching her with a crisp dropkick on the rebound, the fans not too pleased with the disrespect coming from the Vileheart. Maverick’s arrogance gives Vanessa an opening though, the larger woman taking the champion off his feet and off guard with a dropkick of her own. Darquesse doesn’t let up as she picks Mav up with surprising ease and shoots him off the ropes, sending him to the canvas hard with a Nap Time (snap-kick to the chin) for a quick two count. The Elite Champion slinks over to the corner, looking to try and beg off the new prospect but catches her in the trap as a kick attempt is caught and Maverick delivers an over the shoulder Leg Breaker and Dragon Screw combo, his target for the night set. The match becomes all Maverick now, much to the dismay of the fans, the champion delivering leg centric moves, wrapping up his offense with a Celtic Knot that has Vanessa desperately reaching for the break. Darquesse mounts a valiant comeback after being able to make it to the ropes, surprising the champion with a few stiff shots, but one dropkick to the knee cuts down the effort like an arrow to a former adventurer. Done playing games, Maverick grabs Vanessa’s legs and locks her in the Nightfall (Figure Four Deathlock), the new EPIC signee having no choice but to tap out, giving Maverick the submission victory.
Bridget Lewis-Killings: Maverick definitely showed us why he is the Elite Champion of EPIC with a victory over Vanessa Darquesse. The new signee shouldn’t feel any shame in her loss though, as she definitely showed just why she was signed to the company with a fair showing.
A Quick Jolt Of Pep
The camera fades in on Drake Connors doing his best Patton impersonation, giving a pep talk to Dizzie and Celina.
Drake: I know you guys are nervous about facing these RiFiveEn tools. Cel, because of that Hix asshole, Dizz because you want to make sure you’re able to get your revenge the right way, but DON’T BE. I beat the big Wylde idiot by myself after he jumped me like a pussy at that Fatback Jack Fatguts’ table. The kid may have some skill, but he sucks in that ring. Hix... Leave Hicky-boy to me. As for the Wyld Stallyns, Dizz, we’ve fought them. We know each other intimately after that match. I know your skills and what you’re willing to do to win. Those little shits have nothing on you.
Dizzie nods, and mutters “hell yeah”. Drake turns to look at Celina.
Drake: Cel... Rose, you literally have been training since you were able to form coherent sentences. You’ve got the skills, the talent, and the heart... We are a cohesive unit. These tools are not. They fight and squabble amongst themselves. We use that against them. Are you ladies ready?
This time they both utter “Hell yeah” at the same time and Drake nods.
Drake: Then let’s get out there and whip some RiFiveEn ass!
We return to the ring where EPIC co-owners Robert Quinn and Analicia Morales-Connors both stand holding microphones receiving a mixed reaction from the sold out Chaos Complex crowd. Robert smiles as he brings the microphone to his lips.
Robert Quinn: If you'd told me on February 18th when I signed the paper work on this building in order to bring the company I founded over 10 years ago back from the dead and we'd be anywhere near the success as we have been I wouldn't have believed you. Every week you fill the Chaos Complex and we are eternally grateful for your support.
The crowd goes wild chanting "EPIC EPIC EPIC" as Robert puts the mic down to his side and takes it in for a moment before bringing it back up and continuing.
Robert Quinn: Thank you, I could stand here all night just soaking in your chants but we have some business to tend to. I know it feels like the historical night that was REBIRTH just happened but we're already two weeks away from our next Pay Per View event and Analicia and I want to make some matches official for MAYHEM: Devil's Due on May 31st from right here at the Chaos Complex. Analicia I'll let you have the honors of starting our announcements…
Analicia Morales-Connors: Why thank you Robert my friend, you know just how much I love having the honor of making such great announcements for our company. So to kick this off right, I feel we should head right into one of our championship title pictures! Earlier in the night some of us were quite shocked to see the championship celebration of our beloved El Diablo Blanco interrupted by RI5EN, more specifically one Graham Baker.
Just the mention of Baker’s name sends the crowd erupting into jeers, a few expletives even making themselves heard. Analicia couldn’t help but give a slight chuckle before continuing.
Analicia Morales-Connors: I’m guessing you people don’t like him much huh? Well good news is that our champion will have the opportunity to get payback. After deliberating with my esteemed colleague Robert here, we decided to honor Graham’s cash in of the Silver Star Championship, so at Mayhem: Devil’s Due, it will be Graham Baker versus El Diablo Blanco for the EPIC World Championship in another historic unification match!
The fans switch up their tone at the match announcement, showing their undying support for the World Champion. Analicia gives them a moment before moving forward.
Analicia Morales-Connors: The World Championship isn’t the only title that will be on the line though, as every belt will be defended on this night. While other matches will be addressed shortly, I do have to state that our original vision of what the Elite Championship match was going to be has changed. Honestly though, I think it has done so for the better. You see EPIC Elite Champion Maverick will not just have one opponent he will be defending his title against, he will have three!
Despite the participants not being announced, the crowd couldn’t help cheering the match. Analicia was quick to keep going.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Now while Maverick has proven himself a strong champion having fended off several challengers already, this will be his toughest task yet. The first of the three participants is someone the champion is very familiar with as they’ve squared off once before. However, this man has since learned that Maverick isn’t one to take lightly so he’ll be entering this match with new focus. He is “The Prodigal Son” Dragan Hill. Challenger two is someone who, while he has yet to debut in our ring, has made quite a wave with his words, and now he’ll have the chance to back that up. He is Skag! As far as participant number three goes...well he’s someone who before tonight mostly had showings in ring where he slipped up. Tonight though, he not only scored an impressive victory, but a shocking one as well against someone who was seen as a future World Championship contender. That’s right, our tough as nails, if slightly spoiled banana is getting his shot too, as the last participant is none other than Nanners!
Shockingly the fans give a mixed reception, the big banana seeming to have won some people over in the Chaos Complex. Analicia smiles, giving them a little bit and then readying the announcements to move on.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Also it should be known that the four competitors for the Elite Championship will get a chance to better familiarize themselves with each other next week in a tag team match. It will be the debuting Skag teaming up with Dragan Hill against Nanners and the Elite Champion Maverick! Well now, with those two championship matches made official, Mayhem: Devil’s Due is already looking to be an incredible event. However that’s just the beginning. Robert, if you could be so kind as to let these fine people know some of our other amazing matches set to take place…
Before Robert can begin he can't help but acknowledge a particularly eager Nanners fan who is wearing a t-shirt that reads "Nanners put a baby in here!" with an arrow pointing to her stomach. The rather attractive woman is being so loud that security start escorting her out.
Robert Quinn: Hey! Leave her alone, she's just excited she doesn't have to leave. You guys can show her back to her seat, and Ma'am I'll put a word in for you with Nanners.
The security guards take the woman back to her seat and she's all smiles.
Robert Quinn: Now back to those announcements and speaking of Nanners the man he defeated earlier tonight Frank Lowe was so embarrassed by the loss that it saddens me to report that he has handed in his resignation effective immediately.
The crowd cheers this and begins singing "Nah Nah Nah Nah Hey Hey Goodbye".
Robert Quinn: Say what you will about The Lowe Hanger, he was one of our top stars and will be truly missed but his absence leaves 'The EPIC Gamer" Daniel Dream without an opponent for his #1 Contenders match and I know Daniel wants to earn that honor so that's why the young lady who has had her share of trouble with Frank will be his replacement! So at Mayhem: Devil’s Due it'll be "The EPIC Gamer" Daniel Dream taking on Terra Mason with the winner being named #1 Contender for the World Championship and a shot at either El Diablo Blanco or Graham Baker.
Robert looks out at the crowd who seem very happy with that match.
Robert Quinn: We can't forget the championship that you all truly embraced when it was the only active title we had at the time either. The Violence Championship is just as important now as it was then and Drake Connors has been an exceptional champion but he will have his hands full as he defends his title against a man that people are having it written in to their contracts so they'll never have to face him and that man is "The Human Horror Story" Eli Hix. Now Analicia these fine folks may think we're done with championship announcements but I believe you have one more for them.
Analicia Morales-Connors: You’re absolutely right in that there is one more announcement for these wonderful fans here and at home. It’s also fitting we end with this one as it shows just how much EPIC continues to grow and expand. In the first episode of Chaos we crowned the first Violence Champion. At REBIRTH we crowned our first World Champion, as well as crowned the latest champion of what is now known as the Elite Championship. Now, it is with great pleasure that I announce that at Mayhem: Devil’s Due, we will be crowning the first ever EPIC Tag Team Champions!
If the roof could literally be blown off a building by a response, it’d explode with ease as the fans in the sold out Chaos Complex go crazy over the announcement. Analicia gives them time to show their support before continuing.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Now I know you all want to keep going mad, but I want to make sure you know just who will have the privilege of being in the first Tag Team Championship match. Now while this first team isn’t the most popular, they have scored some impressive victories during their time here in EPIC. Representing RI5EN in the match will be the team of Ethan and Lucas Wylde, Wyldeside!
As expected, the reception for Wyldeside’s inclusion causes the fans to boo. Analicia simply smirks and moves on.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Tag team number two is one, that while recently formed, consists of two friends who have known each other for years and trained together in my own Invicta Wrestling Academy. They are the team of Celina del Añil and Xiuhua ‘Dizzie’ Zhou!
The crowd is quick to switch gears in their response, loudly cheering for the two young women set to compete against Wyldeside. Analicia holds her free hand up for a second though, and speaks up once again.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Now I could just stop things there, but I feel like this match deserves all the best our budding tag team division has to offer which is why there will be a third team involved in this championship match! This team made waves in NAPW before coming over to the states and joining up with EPIC. That’s right, the third and final team taking part in this match are the former two time NAPW Juniorweight Tag Team Champions, Hayato Sagara and Ōkami no Ame, The Kaiju Krushers!
The loud reception hits a new high as the fans cheer for the respected and beloved tag team. Analicia once again flashes her gorgeous smile briefly before continuing.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Now Robert dear, I don’t know about you but I think we have ourselves an incredible lineup for Mayhem: Devil’s Due which is only going to get bigger from here.
Robert Quinn: You're exactly right Analicia and while there will be more announcements happening between now and then I think that will wrap up the ones we came out with here to make…
Robert is cut off by the sounds of a record being scratched which leads into church music as the lights go out. "Bitch I'm Blessed" flashes on the tron before pyro goes off and the lights come back up. "Raising Hell" by Kesha hits the PA as EPIC Director of Social Media and VP of Talent Relations Ali Quinn steps out onto the ramp and starts making her way down the aisle holding a mic. She gets to the ring and walks up the stairs before stepping between the ropes and joining her father and Analicia.
Ali Quinn: I had the guys in the truck working on that all night, I'm a go big or go home kinda girl whether it's my shoes, my clothes, or my hair. I figured I needed my entrance to big big too. I'm not sure out of here to talk about me though I'm here Dad…
She looks to Robert who swallows hard anticipating what's coming.
Ali Quinn: To ask you why you've been ignoring my calls for over a week. You made a promise to your granddaughter, is JC cleared or not?
Robert goes to speak but Analicia puts her free hand up, stopping him in his tracks and she snaps her fingers, directing Ali’s attention to her before speaking.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Now I don’t particularly care for or about this little interruption here. I think something like this would have been better saved for a private conversation. As far as I know though, doctor assbutt whatever the fuck his name is hasn’t handed us any type of form indicating that JC even came in for a re-evaluation, let alone that he’s cleared. So promise or not, I don’t think that’ll be the case.
Ali snarls her lip at Analicia.
Ali Quinn: I was talking to my father… NOT YOU. Since you insist on answering for him because he doesn't have the guts to put you in your place though I'll ask you not as a woman but as a mother. My little girl just wants to see her big brother in an EPIC ring and JC is perfectly healthy. He was in the main event fighting for the World title at REBIRTH and he deserves a chance to be at Mayhem as well. He knows he's not getting Baker which is what he wants the most but he just wants to compete and he'll do whatever it takes for that chance. Dr. Hitler said three weeks so he is medically cleared you added the other 3 weeks yourself and I'm begging you to lift it please.
Analicia Morales-Connors: Well isn’t that great that you have a little girl who can so freely express herself. Not all of us are that lucky…
Despite the venom behind Analicia’s words, both Robert and Ali can’t help but to frown a bit. The younger Quinn is quick to regain her resolve though as Analicia continues.
Analicia Morales-Connors: But look, since you decided to pull the M-card on me, I do have to relent just a bit and treat this matter fairly. You say JC is perfectly healthy? Fine, I’ll give him the opportunity to prove your claim. However, that won’t come at Mayhem. You see, while JC did fight for the World Championship at REBIRTH, he also lost and has lost quite a bit here in EPIC, so he will have his chance next week on Chaos. For that night, I’ll lift his suspension, as he will be taking part in a handicap gauntlet match against not two, but all of the members of RI5EN, minus Graham Baker. If he manages to win, that will clearly show me he is physically fit to compete and he will be given a match at Mayhem: Devil’s Due. If he loses, well, let’s just say your little girl will have to wait a while longer before she can see her big brother wrestle in an EPIC ring again. Now if you don’t mind, I have far surpassed my social quota for today, so I’m out.
Analicia looks over at Robert a second, staring a dagger into her co-owner’s eyes before doing the same with Ali. She then shoves her microphone into the young woman’s hands before making her way out of the ring.
RI5EN (Eli Hix & Wyldeside) vs. Drake Connors, Dizzie, and Celina del Añil
Bridget Lewis-Killings: Now ladies and gentlemen we bring to you the main event for this week’s edition of Chaos! As revealed earlier, it will be a six person tag team match featuring RI5EN members Ethan and Lucas Wylde of Wyldeside, along with Eli Hix taking on the team of Celina del Añil, Dizzie, and the EPIC Violence Champion Drake Connors. Now each person in this contest has history with each other and both sides are intent on claiming a decisive win. Will the group that’s been terrorizing EPIC since REBIRTH show their dominance here tonight, or will their opponents get one up on the faction and shake their foundation? We leave you now with the in ring action you’ll be sure to enjoy.
Lucas starts the match for his team and Celina starts for hers. Lucas quickly overpowers his smaller opponent, nailing a spinout powerbomb followed by a belly to belly suplex that sends Cel to her corner where she makes a hot tag to Drake. Drake enters the ring and apparently Lucas has flashbacks to the last time he faced Drake, because he covers his eyes with his hands and then holds them out in supplication as he backs up to his corner where Hix makes the blind tag. Hix with his trademark reckless style attempts to attack Drake with a wild flurry of blows, but Drake just “Matrix” him, blocking every punch before unleashing his own rapid flurry of body blows with deadly precision, followed by a one-two punch which staggers Hix. Drake with the tag to Celina who nails Hix with an absolutely gorgeous dropkick, sending him to his corner where Lucas makes a blind tag of his own. Lucas quickly dominates again as Hix charges across the apron towards Drake, who sidesteps the wild attempt at a spear by the simple expedient of dropping off the apron. Hix flies to the floor, and Drake drags the lunatic up, clearly saying “Come here, you little shit!” A phrase that gives Lucas, who was beating on Cel like she was a cheap rug, pause, giving Cel time to fly over and tag in Dizzie and Drake flings Hix so hard against the barricade that he flies over it into the crowd, where Drake follows, the two having a fist fight in the crowd.
In the ring, Dizz is beating Lucas like a redheaded step-child, not letting the larger man get anywhere near his brother. She finishes off a combo with a massive uppercut right on the knockout button, and Lucas’ knees turn to jelly as he falls unconscious to the mat, where Dizz adds insult to injury and pins his clearly unconscious body. The ref with the count. 1. 2! Ethan tries to save his brother but is yanked off the turnbuckle right into an Angelic Tribute from Celina! 3! Dizzie stands up and roars in victory as Drake returns with Hix in a headlock, punching the insane man in the face. It is only when Hix yells “YES, DADDY! HURT ME MORE!” that a disgusted Drake lets Hix go, throwing him into a rising Ethan Wylde, knocking the smaller man down again. A chorus of boos sound out as Baker and Maverick step out onto the ramp, but Drake and Cel join Dizzie in the ring, quickly making it obvious they’re spoiling for a fight.
Rather than take them up on it, however, Mav and Baker collect their wounded, Mav picking up Hix and speaking gently to the madman, as Baker yanks Ethan up to his feet by his hair and boots the man in the ass to get him moving. Drake, grinning, rolls the still knocked out Lucas out of the ring, where a dazed Ethan and Baker have to carry the larger man out. Drake, Dizzie, and Cel stand victorious center ring as Drake’s theme plays. Hix looks back with a sick grin and fires a single finger gun at Drake. Far from perturbed, Drake shoots back a very different finger, which makes Hix frown as RI5EN exit, going back behind the curtain.